I am stuck in this weird push and pull between the desire to hit the pause button on life and the desire to move in fast forward. I can’t do either, so it’s silly to be stuck wanting both, but here I am.
I want to Pause and get everything done. I want to pause and find focus, objectivity, zen.
I want to fast forward to having more concrete things to do. I want to fast forward to responses, release dates, what comes next. I want more and I want to get there.
Alas, I can only stay in the present. Maybe there’s some zen in there somewhere.